So I’m due to move back in a few months, and already the idea is giving me anxiety problems. Yes I miss my friends and my crazy social life, and yes I can’t wait to join the world of the working again as I discovered I’m SO NOT an academic. (I hate being a student and as much as I’ve grown and expanded my mind not having a proper income KILLS me.) But right after these fuzzy warm feelings about home start tickling my mind the ugly thought of needing a driver rears up its head. BAM! Gone are all those feelings and something akin to the beginnings of a panic attack starts taking over. Waiting. Stress. Waiting. Feeling helpless. Useless. Anxiety. Prayertimes. Closed. Stress. Heat. No Driver. Stress. Arguments with my Mom because she’s hogging up the driver. Pressure. Anxiety. He’s not answering his phone. Anger. Wasted time. Stress!! Argument with Driver!! Anger! He ran a red light! IDIOT! Anger!! STRESS! ANGER!! RAWWWWRRRR!
and that’s when I force myself to snap back to reality and tell myself to CALM DOWN.
Ohhh what am I going to do?